The Sexuality Temptation, Stabilizing Hormones and the Skull

As I had my morning coffee, the "Dear Abby" column captured my eye. A reader wrote in with a dating predicament and ended her letter with that often-heard stereotype that "Women use sex to get love, and guys utilize love to get sex." This is a fantastic summation of the "Sex Trap."

The Sex Trap resembles the Love Trap, where singles translate excellent sex as love. However those who fall into the Sex Trap go even farther since for these songs, making love brings tremendous significance and repercussions.

Singles fall into the Sex Trap in one (or both) of 2 methods:

A.they believe sex is a needed test of compatibility, (if the sex readies then the relationship will be excellent too).

B.more frequently, all consciousness heads out the window, and one or both formerly level-headed singles consider themselves a committed couple as quickly as they make love.
Rather than looking at whether this other person might be a match on levels other than physical attraction-- such as long-lasting requirements, requirements, and wants-- they are blind-sided by the chemistry under the covers.

No doubt, it can be challenging to correspond with truth when all those hormones are running wild. Our body responds to someone we are drawn in to by producing hormones such as PEA or phenylethylamine (natural amphetamine), dopamine and norepinephrine (natural state of mind enhancers), and testosterone (increases libido), which makes the opportunity to make love with someone we are attracted to exceptionally difficult to resist. After orgasm, we produce oxytocin (which acts on the hypothalamus to produce feelings), which makes us feel extremely close to and bonded with our sex partner.

These chain reactions are uncontrolled and strong , leading to powerful feelings of destination, excitement, love, wellness, and look at this now closeness .

However when issues emerge, those who fall under the Sex Trap frequently justify by believing, "Well, we've got problems, but the sex is excellent!" They most likely wouldn't admit it, however they prioritize physical intimacy and relate to the rest as optional. Their primary scouting tools are sexual tourist attraction and physical compatibility.

Barry North, an RCI coach who works primarily with gay males, says that a lot of his clients have fallen into the Sex Trap.

" For gay guys particularly in cosmopolitan locations, sex is readily offered, and that in itself is a trap," North says. Why waste your time if the sex isn't really going to be excellent?".

Nevertheless, North adds, "I believe this is a ' man' thing instead of a 'gay' thing.".
I do want to point out that chemistry is crucial. Chemistry is a provided that we cannot control in a relationship; it is either there or not there, and it should be there for the partnership to work. If not there, we cannot "make" chemistry take place, though in some cases it can grow over time.

Songs who pursue a relationship based upon sexual chemistry risk relationship failure when the hormone-induced intoxication wears away and truth hits.

To avoid the Sex Trap, you need to stabilize your heart (and hormones) with your head. This implies combining chemistry with good sense. While great sex is necessary for a sustainable relationship, you need to make your partner options by paying full attention to your vision, objectives, values, and requirements -- while feeling all those exciting triggers!

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15

Comments on “The Sexuality Temptation, Stabilizing Hormones and the Skull”

Leave a Reply

Gravatar